Natalie

And so she has announced her departure from the operatic scene.

Hm.....


I don't entirely know what this is doing to and with my insides.


You see, the thing is, I have never really been one for idols, or heroes, or..you know?
I've never REALLY been a fan of anyone, a true, hardcore fan.

The thing in my life that's only ever been that thing, is my thing with Natalie Dessay, the opera singer.
I first saw a DVD with her when I was 13. Or so.
I remember staying up till ridiculous o'clock, trying to mimick her sounds.
This is the closest to idolization I've ever got to.
And I do idolise her, absolutely to this day.

She is impeccable.
Her technique is second to absolutely none, and then the artistry, which is another topic entirely.
Divinity.

And I always had this idea, of seeing her live. Really seeing her in a production.
One of the big ones, you know?
The coveted roles, one of the ones that shape careers.

This was always my idea. My idée-fixe. 
And I always thought I'd do this when I was old enough, or wealthy enough, or just something enough, because I thought I had all the time in the world.
And more.

And sometimes people have these moments in their lives when they realise - we have no time.
Let's be honest, we don't.
Because things change, life happens, and we control none of it.

You just do not know.

And I waited for so long, I waited 11 years to then miss my chance to see the one artist live that will be The Artist for me most probably until I die.
How's that for hilarious.

And don't get me wrong - I'm not sat here going ape-sh*t because a soprano stopped singing opera.
It's the concept.
The concept of time, darlings.

We wait, and wait, and wait. For the perfect time.
Which - sorry to break it to myself, and everyone else - never arrives.
Ever.

Because there will always be a more perfect time.
And a more perfect time after that.
And after that.
A line which never ends.

If you want something, fight for it now.
If you want to be something, fight for it now.
If you want a chance, fight for it now.
If you want to travel, make it happen now.
If you want anything, bust your balls - but do it now.

Because the glittering miracle you're after might not be sat there some time from now.

This is the problem with young people. We think we have soooooooo mucccchhhh tiiiiiiime.....
Like there's a special time-god somewhere, spending all his love and grace on the 20-somethings.
But there isn't.

So don't blink and realise it's gone.
The thing with unicorns is they don't stick around and wait for sunrise.
They usually disappear.

And wouldn't that be a shame.

Yours truly.
M.