writing

I feel I have something to write about.
And I'm feeling so grateful that this feeling exists.
So grateful.

Firstly, this week and the triple bill of soul-shaking theatre has been ridiculous.
And I really hope it shook something loose.
Since I have a feeling there is something to write about it must have changed something.

I'm watching Louis Theroux's documentaries.
Now, if you do not know who this man is, please please do look him up!
His documentaries are great.
And he takes it all face-value.
As much as one can.
With an open heart and he just listens to the people.
But he does find the strangest topics.
Fascinating.

And I want things!
I want to go to India, go to Goa, go see and grow and go open up.
But this is not the time yet.
It would hit me too hard.
The time is later on, but I will do it.
Really, really, really, really, really.



And yes, I think, yoga this week with Pisces.
She mentioned her place at some point, and I need something to balance my mind.

I also decided not to do this competition thing later in November.
Not the time.

I mean.
This bit in my life is all about the shaking loose.
Therefore - I should move more.
I need to shake loose, all the emotions.
All of it.

And also.
This photo below is beyond my means of description.
The shadows.
The shapes.
If I would ever have to approach a naked woman in a sexual context, I would pass out.
How do you even begin, to approach this?
This form.
Also, this photographic example just popped up on tumblr.
It's not the details necessarily.
It's the Thing.
The Female being as such.

And when women don't value themselves, it makes my skin crawl.
It is so widespread, it makes women seek value where there is none to be found.
And also it wrecks so many children, and then the men.
And I'm not talking relationships, but a step before, the first source of Love.
The Mother.

Oh, women.
Seriously.

Nope, cannot.
Lack the vocab.




And so.
Happy Saturday, my dears.
It's such a world we live in.

And can I just say, Dalai Lama.
Compassion.
This is all we need.
Nothing else comes into play, at all.
Just compassion.

Be kind.
Yours truly.
M.

the self

So the thing is.
Most of us grow up and end up compensating for some unfulfilled need or desire throughout our adult life.

The majority of what's missing can be summed up, I think, as an unbalanced relationship with the understanding of our own value, or something that is also known as "self-love".
I've found that people very often have an almost defensive reaction when someone mentions the notion of loving ourselves.
As if it's wrong, or faulty.
As if we shouldn't.

The truth is we need it.
I mean, it's just the way it is.
If we don't respect ourselves, no one else will.
Without loving ourselves, the chances of finding someone who truly loves us are slim.
Truly slim.
I've yet to meet someone who would prove me wrong on this one.
(If you do know someone, please tell me the story. I would love-love to know.)

So.
For those who don't speak Estonian, I'm truly sorry for the lack of translating.

But the bottomline is.
Compare yourself to yourself, the rest is empty and meaningless.

Build yourself stronger, because if we're honest, it's the only place we will ever find refuge.

Yours truly.
M.


These are taken and edited from www.alkeemia.ee 

Piisavas enesearmastuses elav inimene:

•    adekvaatne enesehinnang
•    ennast väärtustav
•    on võtnud 100%vastutuse oma elu eest
•    usub enda võimetesse ja vajalikkusesse
•    langetab otsuseid armastuse, usalduse ja rahu pinnalt
•    maailma suhtes avatud meeltega
•    tunnetab oma tegevuse väärtust ise
•    vaimselt ja füüsiliselt terve, positiivsust kiirgav, energiat andev
•    tunnetab armastust endas ja kiirgab seda
•    on ennast kehtestav
•    on orienteeritud koostööle
•    tajub ressursside paljusust ja tõmbab enda ellu kõik vajaliku

Kui olete seda tüüpi, et teil on just raske asju lõpule viia, siis loobuge meelelahutusest seni, kuni teete asja lõpuni-esitate ära-annate üle ja teadvustage eneses see tunne, kui saite tehtu valmis enne tähtaega, õigeks ajaks või saite positiivse tagasiside osaliseks.

Hakake end võrdlema endaga mitte teistega.
Kas te olete täna armastavam, hellem, mõistvam kui olite aasta tagasi?
Kas mõistate oma sõnade, tegude, suhtumise tagajärgi endale ja teistele täna selgemalt kui aasta tagasi?

Kas teete iga päev midagi väikest, mis näitab, et oskate ennast hoida – leiate aega korralikuks lõunaks, sööte tervislikku toitu, kannate õiget rõivastenumbrit ja teile sobivat stiili, kas väljendate nii oma sõnas kui mõttes tänulikkust selle kõige eest, mis Teie elus täna võrreldes eilsega paremini on?

Kui hakkate tegelema teiste inimeste asemel endaga, võite märgata peatselt kolme olulist muutust –
- teie enesetunne hakkab tõusma
- teie tervis muutub paremaks
- teie suhete kvaliteet muutub rahuldustpakkuvamaks.

See kõik tekib hetkest, mil te otsustate, et Teie ise olete oma elu peaosas, võimeline selle kõiki aspekte soovi korral muutma ning õpite nautima oma elu ilusaks loomise vastutust, millega kaasenevad suurenenud vabaduse-, õnne- ja rahutunne.