soft

Hello, my darlings.

This is a post about "soft".


Right.
I don't know about you but I grew up thinking "soft" will never ever get you anywhere at allll in this life.
And then I grew.
Just became more and more, cold and rigid, and tank-like.
And I used to love this.
The worse it got, the "better" I thought it all was.
Ooooooooohh, look at meee, I'm like a tank.

Lo-and-behold, I turned 23 or something and realised none of this - and I mean, NONE of this - works.
Nor does it have any logic.

Tank.
Seriously.
What.
Why would that be a good thing.
How can anyone make music like that?
How can anyone love or make love like that?
How can anyone make art, or something new?
How could anyone create like that?

One word: ice-queen.



And yes, la-la-la, "invincible and Strong" and whatever.
Point is.

It's actually a living breathing walking suicide. 

And it's so addictive, as is everything, let's be honest here.
You do something enough times and it becomes second nature.
Pretty simple.
Repetition is the root-mother of every thing.
SIMPLE AS.
You do something enough, and BAM! you think it's "my character".
I've done it enough times.

It's the rule that makes nature wonderful and terrifying.

So repeat the RIGHT things.
RIGHT FOR YOU.
F*CK someone else's "rights" and "wrongs".
Pick and choose what you want to be, pick and choose what you want to be seen as.
Make your life.
Make YOURSELF.

God.
This is super to myself.
Screw them all.
This is what I think.
All of them.
And just make YourSelf.
Pick the people, embrace and love and keep the people who let you be You, and just don't expect anything more or anything less.
Just You, the You-est you and the You of YOUR own choosing.
Not someone's cat or Jesus Christ's grandma.
Just YOU.

Enough with the ice queen tendencies now.
I don't like people like that, why should I ever try to BE it myself.

I am the dreamer, the soft ripe giving thing, like spring and wet soil, y'know?
Muddy, dirty, bloody, like gawddamn Mother Earth.
So why, again, my favourite question of all existence, why would I then turn into ice, which is by its very definition the opposite of wet, warm and fertile?

And if we want to talk about strength, then what is actually stronger than the earth, the basis on which all of this motherfrikkin circus is standing on anyway.

So seriously.
I need to stop this infantile ridiculousness.
And just become the person I want to be.
And kick ass like that.
I don't know why this is taking so long....but hey. Patience after-all.

Patience.
Keep muddy, keep warm and keep wet.
Peace out, darlings.

Yours truly.M.

grace and choice

This lyric from this song absolutely kills me.
I love it, beyond beyond.



And usually these lists of nice -insert something- don't work for me, but this is truly wonderful.
And I am inclined to agree with all of it.

all for less

This song.
Kills my insides.
Somehow.

If you have some time, please give it a watch.

Repeat.
M.

sthlm

So it's my last night in Stockholm and I'm watching Lord of the Rings, the first one, and A's making vegetable soup.
Tomorrow, my flight leaves at 3pm and then it's back to TLN.

This has been an awesome visit, and a strange one at the same time.
But the awesomeness outweighs the strangeness ten-ten-ten-fold.

The awesomeness.
IT'S SPRING HERE.
I mean, honestly.
There's a photo below of one of the bridges in the centre of town, going towards Gamla Stan, the old town. And the sea/river thing is free of ice! I mean, free of ice! As a Norseman, this makes me so happy I was just stood there yesterday, staring like a seagull or something.
And A's flat is like, beyond superb. It's white, and practical, and cosy and just like, SUPER. Honestly. Again, Maria wants a nest, vol. 2000.

And it's been a highly highly educational visit, in so many ways. But more of that later on.

You live and you learn. And the important things anyway are friends, and homes and spring!! Which will always come again.
And feeding ducks, and parks, and music, and smiling at strangers, and being open to stuff, and seeing the King (which I did, by the way), and I don't even know.
The important things which we sometimes think about.
But that's stupid.
And a waste of time.

So as spring approaches, I won't forget.

With love.
M.

bare

I just don't have the vocabulary to talk about how much I like this image.
I like how dynamic it is, the light and shade and the black-and-white-ness of the image.
It is bare and powerful and naked and cold and explosive in its warmth at the same time.

Great caption, superb shapes.

Bare.
M.