freedom

From http://lazyyogi.org/
Love him.

And I love all of you right now.

Light.
Yours truly.
M.

“Discipline, as understood by a warrior, is creative, open, and produces freedom. It is the ability to face the unknown, transforming the feeling of knowing into reverent astonishment; of considering things that exceed the scope of our habits, and daring to face the only war that is worthwhile: The battle for awareness.” ~ Castaneda

Discipline has a negative connotation to most people. It definitely had that connotation for me in the past. Meditation changed that for me. 

On the outside, it looks very disciplined to sit for an hour each day in absolute stillness and silence. But on the inside, it is incredibly freeing. 

Take the idea of focusing, for example. When your mind is scattered in several different directions, then it seems like it takes effort to focus. But when you are entirely present in this moment with what you are doing, then focus is natural. It is effortless. How hard do you have to focus when doing something you love? The focus comes spontaneously. 

Well, when you are always present with what is going on, that focus is natural to you. The same goes for discipline. It is a matter of clarifying your aspiration and aligning your desire in every moment. 

If you are always battling with conflicting thoughts and feelings, you will only succeed in making yourself exhausted. Recognize what you really want and need and how those two are one. Then sacrifice all of your urges and desires that stand in the way. 

Self discipline means to remain unmoved by the transient and unimportant things that crop up on a moment to moment basis. This comes with practice and familiarity. 

But it is also worth noting that the discipline is only thought of as such when those conflicts are there. Once distraction and inner conflict hold now power over you, then there is just peace and the natural way of going with the flow of your life, the Tao. Not resisting what must be done and not avoiding anything. 

Namaste

lately

Lately I've been thinking a lot about where I'm gonna go next, with my life.
I know there is a next step that needs to be taken, but what is it I cannot say to save my life.

I sometimes read my past posts from the few months gone by (I write so much I never remember all the stuff I've blurted out).
And at some point not too long ago I wrote this post in which I was talking about the life I want.

Amongst many other things I said:

"I want to get my feet wet, travel and sing."


As always, I don't remember having paid this sentence any attention what-so-ever. Which is a good thing, otherwise I would not have written it down quite like this.
It just feels like a key, to something.
A door or a portal to the next part of my life.

"I want to get my feet wet, travel and sing."

And below are the pictures from yesterday.
Another full house!

Have a good Thursday!
M.


This was the mirror in the church.
OH and then we climbed the church tower, that was super cool.

reading list

...from Rachel Brathen.
If you don't know her, go check her out.
http://www.rachelbrathen.com/

Anyway.
A super short reading list I plan to come back to after Finland and Midsommar.
Law of Attraction by Esther Hicks.
And also some Eckhart Tolle. I think this has been a long time coming.

I hope I get along well with these books.
I want some reading to really, really shake my brain.

And it's also time to update the blog appearance once more.
This always means a time to get back to writing and drawing and doing creative things a lot more.
Cause it annoys me to no end when I realise that I've been in a non-creative hole for a bit.

Oh, also, I realised the tour is starting soon so I want to start practising the piano, ready to utilise the grand pianos in the concert places.
So excited. For this.
Seriously.

And so here I am, downloading some music, drinking tea, and getting ready for my Fin-dventure a la Midsommar-madness.
Packing list also includes:
Swimsuit (for the forest lake YES)
Drawing pad (I need to sharpen dem pencils)
"Women who run with the wolves" (Recommend strongly)
And of course, in true Nordic style, mosquito repellent.

Have a super awesome weekend everyone.
I plan to return on Monday night having spent time drawing, swimming, breathing, meditating, probably skipping over some meadows, and just resting. Fingers crossed I get to row a boat. That would simply be nothing short of ideal.

So.
Not to underestimate the weekend ahead.
Not only is it the turning point in the year, and the seasons, plus it should also be some crazy moon situation, as I've heard.
Think good thoughts.
The shortest night of the year is so good for this.
And those Nordic ones reading this, go into a forest and see what's going on.
I mean, there's a reason our ancestors did that. Go find your luck and good fortune.
Spend some nature time. Get muddy and dewy and wet.

HAPPY SOLSTICE.
I'll leave you with Lana.

Peace.
M.

MUSIC

Oh my JESUS what new FRESH music does to me!
My spleen has been doing an excited dance for a few hours now!
And it's SO NICE.
Hello, spring, hello, doing things, and hello, no fear.

I'm waking up, I feel it in my bones
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new ageI'm Radioactive, Radioactive

Radioactive.
M.

sense

this makes the most sense
out of anything
ever

no knowledge is knowledge unless you make it yours
unless this means something to you it's useless
so even if someone you respect to the Moon and back says something and you simply don't agree with, you don't have to bend your mind to do that

if it matters to you, keep it.
if it makes sense to you, believe it.
if it makes you feel clarity, follow it.

it doesn't matter whether it's a system or whether you've borrowed bits and pieces from here and there - if it is something that makes you grounded and hopeful and excited, if this knowledge is yours, that is the only thing that matters.

Sense.
M.

personal

What a beautiful envelope.

Happy Tuesday. 
M.

bread exchange

and the Wonderful, Wonderful Malin.
http://thebreadexchange.com/

This is another one of my blog recommendations.

Malin is this Swedish young woman, currently living somewhere in Germany. And basically, she started this project called the Bread Exchange.
She started making bread just for banter at home, but as she was trying out so many new things and experimenting a lot she had loads of left-over bread, which she started giving to her friends. Her friends in return would give her...little things, whatevers, homemade jam, or write a poem, or offer to fix her bike.
In short, this grew into a network of people involved in the Bread Exchange.

It is so simple.
Malin makes bread. Posts where she will be (she travels a lot with her job) and then people can set up a meeting with her.
Malin will bring bread.
In return, you can make her or give her anything at all, whatever you want.
Everything, except money.

Her blog is a wonderful wonderful mix of her journey and the journey of Bread Exchange, with awesome photos from her travels.
And Malin herself comes across simply as a truly wonderful being.

"Everything is not for sale."
M.

Photo from the bread exchange blog.

happy fox

Happy fox is happy.

Fox.
M.

saturday night

So.

We went out last night.
I'd spent the whole day in town (surprise-surprise) so I was a little knacked.
So what ended up happening was this -

No, actually, I thought that if I'd do this to my face I'd actually get up and get ready.
Which I did.

People were coming round - girls, to get ready at ours - and I was just sat there, top of the stairs, with an eyeliner pencil in my hand, just seeing what I can do.
I was quite pleased.
Then I put on a coat, backwards, and starting waltzing with AJ. She said: "I suddenly had the urge to kiss you." With my face, LIKE. THAT?
So it was an interesting beginning to a Saturday night.
The rest of it wasn't nearly as interesting.

But there.
Make-up.
M.

52

52 days left of 2012.
fifty
two
days
a lot of days that is


These past couple of years and this one included are turning out to be big ones. Not anything particular, just personal developments of all kinds.

I realised I hadn't challenged myself in so long
(so that's why I'm now supplying challenges left, right, and centre.)
(...not really that many. just enough to get some inertia going)


mistakes.
making mistakes
and learning from mistakes
...mistakes are good.


Also. Like, "am I proud of myself", is an interesting question. 
So often the pride-o-meter is applied by us from an outside angle. I used to be terribly concerned with whether person A is proud of me, or person B, and so forth. 
This is fine.
But I mean, what about me? What about you? What about, "are we proud of ourselves"?


Pride. 
Pride is an interesting one.
Taking pride in what you do.
Pride is one of the Seven Deadly Sins. (This is somewhat beside the point, just an interesting digression.)

Measuring myself according to my own scales of pride, not someone else's.



Failing, as well.
What is that about? This fear of failure b*llshit?
It is so common, but also, such a massive load of crap.
Failing at what? And why should anyone be scared?
(Please note that I'm talking here more about myself than anyone else.)
(And I'm also going to come back to this topic, soon.)
There's a thing, a way of working out, apparently, called "Failing".
So the point is, you do something until you physically "fail" - your body gives out.
You don't count.
You don't measure the distance.
You go till you fail.
You go till you go.
I'm not going to go into the physical benefits of this or the lack of, that's for other people to discuss who know much more about this, but.
The reason I find this interesting is that failing itself becomes a thing. A thing that is fine, all the time. Not THE thing you fear most.
You workout, till you fail. Only to workout again, to fail, again.
It sets up quite a healthy relationship with the term.
So, let's fail.
And then fail again.




so Yoga Neil and Mermaid A. will rave through the universe, only drinking shots, with REALLY great abs. 
drunk and fit. rowdy, a little slutty and SO MUCH FUN.

you will eat msg noodles and be great at tap and swimming and riding,

i will eat tubs upon tubs of icecream and i'll be good at yoga and kickboxing.

we will create fear and chaos in the heart of every swede and Adam Levine (RHYME HO) and it will be glorious.

Chaos and Mayhem, + abs.

52 days left.
Make
them
count.

i want sushi.
M.

oh and by the way

...We did the pizza+OFFICIAL+yay+day thing today. 

And it was divine.
M+E.



COOOOOKE. Cans of Coke in the fridge make. a. home.