turn it into

There was this thing somewhere - "Don't dwell on the past, but turn it into art."

I have been creating somewhat lately, or at least I don't feel uninspired.

But still, I feel, there's so so much room, for more.
So many things I want to do and so so many things I want to accomplish.

So many ideas that are kind of there, but kind of not.
Seedlings.

But hey, can't rush stuff.
It gets there, when it gets there.
And I'm not brave enough to talk loudly of not-even-new-born ideas.
But soon.
I'd love to talk about these things, out loud, soon.

For now, keep creating.
And I'll do the same.

Yours truly.
M.

out out, anyone?

So, here I was.
On the trolly bus, on my way home. Thinking of the quiet Friday night ahead, spent analysing the poems that the tour-songs are based on.
All no-make-up, dirty hair, random flip-flops, having spent the day with the Spanish one, dumplings and sunshine.

So, as I said, here I was.
And lo-and-behold, one of my homies sends me a message saying that she absolutely wants to go out and no one's taking the bait.
To which my answer was: "Have I ever said "no" to you, my dear?"

I've now done my hair, my face, and I just need to get dressed.

THIS IS SO GOOD, let's be honest.

Why? you may ask.
Well, that's because the next time I have a free weekend the calendar says "3rd of August, 2013".

That's why.

So off I go, to Yolo- and Humourland.

Peace.
M.

Saturday

..and it continues.

Saturday was scaffolding day!

The morning started with the last one of my Flower-valley (Lilleoru) lectures. Which was so dense.
And I think that in my head I was already back in Tallinn preparing the gig.
So I took notes but I need to work through all of it.
But the day was absolutely beaut so it was delicious being there.

Then 7 hours of wisdom later mum and I drove back, straight to the church.
Some getting ready time, a quick rehearsal with the pianist, learning some last words.
And then off we went!


I'm so pleased we did this.
And it was so good.
The feedback was so super, like truly super. I was so surprised just how much it had touched people, including my own friends.
And I hadn't done a big project in so long, so in terms of person accomplishment this day was huge, for me.

Also, through this project I found an idea that I want to carry with me and share for a long long time:
That beauty will remain if we share with one another. (Crap translation on my part. "Üksteisega jagades jääb ilus püsima" in Estonian.)
The idea that everything fades, if we don't share. This applies to values, language, culture, ideas, beliefs, memories, stories and heritage. Share. Share with your friends with your families.
Tell them stories, show them photos, but share.
Because I've realised I don't believe in much else than just the beauty of this world, life and planet.
So share.

And then Saturday night brought more circus.

I went out, everywhere, with my backpack.
Saw the girls, sat with some friends, and then at 4AM met the Spanish one for a trip to Privé. Which was circus. Let's just say a whole session of "Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights" ensued and it was just ridiculous ridiculous jokes.

The Saturday night ended on Sunday at 9pm (?!...I rate us highly), in Vapiano, with two bear shaped pizzas.

Complaints?

NONE.
M.

retrograde

A while ago I wrote about Mercury being in retrograde.
This time around it's time for Pluto to have some fun.
However, when Mercury's thing lasted a month, Pluto will have lots of funsies for 5 months and we're currently a month in.
So.

http://www.finerminds.com/consciousness-awareness/plutos-retrograde/

As ever, I don't follow these things knowingly. I stumbled upon this and in retrospective the first month has absolutely been following this song and dance.
Besides, these are all nice things and suggestions anyway, so why not.

The article's not very long, so if you've got a minute, look through it.
If anything is of use, we all get a point.
If not, no harm done.

Happy retrograde. 
M.


Me and E. spending a Monday night. Spanish one took the shot. Happy homeland times, one and all.

people

So what about the people to fan our flame?
How and where do we draw a line?

I mean.
What?

What
what
what

Fan your flame.
Is that a purpose?
Is that a necessity?
What the f*ck.
I don't even know.

Whatever.
M.


Not "whatever" though, you know?
That's the point.
This is NOT "whatever".
This is important.

prince rama

This is insane(-ly good).

New age glitter madness from Brooklyn.
I mean, just listen to this song.
This makes me want to dance on a meadow, naked and glittery.
With horses, at dawn.
And I don't know.
Flowers in my hair.

And I mean, really do that.
Really do that.

Prince Rama - "So Destroyed".

DANCE YOUR SOUL OUT.
M.

for now

This is the only photo I have of the birthday proceedings, for now.
So I'm just going to say, this was excellent. 
A's still here and I'm seeing her off today, as she flies back to STHLM. (And I'm following on Saturday.)

I hope you had a good weekend, sweets.

With love.
The 24-year-old.

clear out

Today I am being productive and doing something that I've been putting off for a while - the "big clear out".

My boxes should be arriving from LDN today so I'm equally super excited but also aware that I was to make a lot of space. So I'm just sorting through all my belongings in TLN to see whether I actually need any of them. And so far so good.
The bin bags are filling and it honestly feels like it's easier to breathe.

And of course my favourite t-shirt with Edward Cullen is helping me out.
Thanks, clothing item.

Make your own air.
M.

spring

Spring is coming, it's official.
The sun was so hot yesterday. And it's sunny again today.

I might actually go to town today, and stare some sunshine in the face (..ps, I did do that, and it was so nice. The pretty one came and picked me up, and we had some pasta in sunny sunny Vapiano.)

Crazy what sunshine does.

Embrace the rays.

With love.
M.

PS. I JUST CAN'T WAIT :)

kick some butt

I have the urge to kick some serious butt.
This will happen tomorrow (it is currently 11:45pm) and take off especially once I'm back in the homeland and will be reunited with my gym.

Butt, you shall be kicked.
M.

maria's day out

It's so nice and sunny, and today is all for culture.
See you later!

Have a nice Thursday.
M.

let's go Hollywood

So over-flowing with zhuzh.
Curvy.
Lush.
Naughty.
And vivacious.
And healthy.
Well-fed, well-dressed, well-spoken.
Beau-ti-ful.

Screw this, and let's go old-school Hollywood.
M.

Maria's day out

Yesterday.
It was lovely to be out and about. Seriously lovely.
AJ and I went for some lunch in Vapiano, which is my fave in Tallinn, Stockholm and London. And then for some tea and cake.
I got a new mascara which I've been meaning to do for about, 2-3 weeks. It's a Rimmel one so all new for me. It's meant to be "extremely black" so we'll see.

Town was nice, nice and wintery. But it just reminded me why I want to move. The actual mass of people just tired me out so much. The pace, and the noise, and the amount of people.
I bumped into one of my mates from school right outside Oxford Circus station, which is actually like a needle in a very large haystack.
So pros and cons, you know. Seeing him just reminded me how many people I know in this city that I haven't seen in so so long, but then the place itself has kind of lost its magic for me. For now.

I have an actual to-do list today.
And I plan to do all those things, with the help of AC/DC.

Hooray for to-do-lists.
M.

flowers

Good morning!

Hardly moring, but oh well. My porridge, Classic FM and I are having a great time.

And today I'm going to (London-)town with AJ, for some tea at this place (http://www.camelliasteahouse.com/) and a little snowy walk in town.
I've spent way too much time indoors with boxes.

Last night was gamenight. We played 3 games of "Reis ümber maailma" which means "Trip around the world". And it was brilliant.

The other day I had flowers in my hair, and had the most fun-inducing pony-tail.

I hope you're having a good day.
And if you can - play in some snow.

With love.
M.



By Andreas Wonisch (2010)

dangle

I used to do this all the time in our old house.
Only I wasn't as high up as she was.
My room was on the 1st floor, or those who don't follow the UK floor system - that would be the 2nd floor.
And my window faced our neighbours apple-trees which were so nice, whatever the season. And I would just sit there, dangle my legs and read.
Or just sit there and stare at the sky, daytime or nighttime.
One time, when I had just discovered Bob Marley, courtesy of my first-love, I sat exactly like this and listened to "No woman, no cry" 46 times. Or was it 42. Either of these digits.

So yes, I am a huge fan of this. Huge fan.

(I'm packing.)

Dangle more.
M.

SWAT-team, move out

The last lol of the lolcat.
M.

(where's my velvet rhino?)

1-2-3-4

crazy ass kids

I've genuinely had the month of a teenager. Or a very chilled out twenty-something.
Both things very not me.
New style, ya know?
And why not.

I told a friend a week or so ago that whenever I see him I feel as if he looks like he's on holiday. Or there is just something very holiday-y about him. A certain relaxed atmosphere, or maybe it's just being so at home in your own skin? Which almost counts as a constant holiday anyway..
Well, whatever it is, I like it a lot. And I admire it about him.
So why not snatch it?

let them in
let them in
let them in
HEEYYYY
M.

(ps, I WAS wearing trousers. just the jumper at 7am was no longer tucked in.)

(found this song on Dani's blog. http://dani.metromode.se/)

9 good reasons

Saturday morning made me laugh.
I got a trolley bus home from town, at 08.03am, clear as a sunshiny day.
And it made me laugh, so very much. That whole situation.
And I think I giggled the whole way.
I was wearing a hat, and I wasn't cold.

The whole night was meant to end at 2am, when the right person asked me why I'm going the wrong way.
And then the smoky chats about the state of the arts, specific advice how to further my career, suburban slang, who would eat cats or dogs, how to raise your pigs, benefits of working in a gold mine in Australia, what makes an Estonian, lovely kind people, double-straws, wet feet dancing, shouting "SAY MY NAAAME!" whilst dancing with said wet feet, then the bean bag jumping, and the squealing, and the Cosmos, and the leftover Cosmo shots, and the morning, and the "Ich liebe" to Tallinn, and the 7.30am empty bottles to the bins.
This week just gone was incredible.

(Friday. what is that sparkle?
Ps, I promise I don't actually have a facial expression as unpleasant as that. My Dell snapshot central does that to me. And it's slightly hideous.
So for now, for the lack of a better face/expression, my apologies.)

 

And now I made pasta for dinner. I don't make good pasta and this was good.

And I replaced my old phone that just refused to work anymore.
And out of love, the old one is being repaired.
And the new one is nice.
As was the pasta.
So much nice, it's coming out of my ears.

I want to be a man, and I want to be the Count of Monte Cristo.
M.