forza vitale

Hey, guys!

For starters, can I just say. Thank you for reading.
Thank you for allowing me to share this with you.
My ins and outs, and seeing where this leads.
Tutto è amore.


(PS. I think it's time soon to complete some more blog-post-drafts.)

So.
I took my own advice and started filling this new found space (discussed in the previous post) with forza vitale.

Number 1 was Bellini.
Bellini is this brilliant Italian opera composer, was alive and kicking early 19th century.
And he has written this opera about this sleepwalking girl.
And I was rinsing my brain with this BRILLIANT aria from this opera on Friday.
And it helped eeeeverything.

Number 2.
Then, I got my hair done.
It's now the rust colour I was after.

Number 3.
And then Pisces picked me up last night and took me to see this woman who makes jewellery of semi-precious stones and crystals.
I had a concrete plan of just going.
Trusting my intuition and seeing which stone I find.
Just hearing what calls to me.

And so - there were loads of bracelets and necklaces and so forth.
Nothing.
No connections to anything.
Then I saw this wall with pendants.
So this was Call no1.
And as I started browsing I saw my stone - Call no2 - quite seriously.

I don't think I've ever had a moment like that, I just felt this energy.
I know I talk a whole bunch about all this, the energies and universe and so forth, but I had never even thought this possible with y'know..a rock.
But seriously, I was blushing my head off, so so much energy, and heat.
It just matched.

And so, I bought it, it's mine, it belongs with me.
The crystal is called Aqua Aura and apparently it is super intense.
The lovely woman-babe who makes these beauuutiful pendants and bracelets did say that I should only take this with me if I am "ready".
Ready to accept and embrace everything that will come my way, learn further, develop further, see more, hear more, trust more, love more openly and freely, restrict myself less, no boundaries, just following my soul, my freedom, my Heart and my own truth.

So I said yes, I'm ready.
Let's do this.

You know, I JUSTTT wrote about this in the previous post.
The space that Acceptance left.
And this crystal (photo below) just brings this all together.
Nature does not deal in empty space, I always say this.
Empty space gets filled with something.
And if we get to it quick enough, we can fill the gaps in our lives ourselves.
When the departure of something creates vacuum, just give it something, one push, apply the substance and it will be sucked in.
The vacuum pulls it in.

If we ignore this, the vacuum will suck in something anyway, but most probably unnecessary, or toxic, or and old pattern.
Help yourself.
I am helping myself with Italian, and more opera, and new hair, and new thoughts, and ....there's plenty space for something else.
Actually the woman yesterday suggested drawing.
Funny that, it's something I always forget even though I adore it.
Dancing.
Yoga?
A big big clean.
Out with the old energy, to further create more space, more vacuum.

And never to forget that everything, every single thing, every single pain and hurt and loss and emotion is a Teacher.
We learn something from every turn, we learn something from every experience.
The soul never loses, it only gains.

Tutto è amore.
Love, always.

Yours truly.
M.

love

Last night I was sat in a sauna, around 2am.
I was there on my own, which hasn't happened in a very long time.
I used to do that all the time in our old house but ever since it's always either with friends, or at the gym. All good options.
But it used to have a very different effect and meaning for me.
A semi-meditative almost-ritual, just some purifying time alone.
And a time for good thoughts, lots of new, good thoughts.

And so I sat there, late last night.
Spanish and CH were sat outside, and I was in the sauna thinking my thoughts.

And out of nowhere sprang these ideas about love.
And what makes "it work".
I've seen so many people, find love, fall in love, experience the feelings.
And then something happens.
And so I ask, what happens?

And the more I looked at this the more I realised that love is everywhere.
We find it everywhere.
As a race, you know.
And there are so many people we could connect with, given the circumstances.
So love happens, everywhere.
But that's not It.
"It" is a decision.

When a person decides, "yes, I choose you", and coincidentally the other person decides just the same, "I choose you too", then "It" happens.

I've seen so many of my friends choose.
But one of them.
As in, they choose, but the other one simply doesn't.
And that's how far it goes.
This is nothing about, value, worth, or "if I would've had better hair", or "laughed at his jokes more".
Et
cetera

It's not a game of what-if-i-could-persuade-someone-to-appreciate-me-please-please.
It's choice+choice.
(Or very often, choice+not choice.)
Point is.
Don't fret, darlings.
Just make sure you make your own choices, make them right and make them in time.

Yours truly.
M.

In other news - I miss the Christmas tour. Good sign!

hunter

I fell in love with a treasure hunter once.

Me in love with him.
He in love with treasure.


M.

don't die at 25

“Most people die at 25 and aren’t buried until they’re 75”

—	Benjamin Franklin

This quote, is so true.
This happens (and happens visibly) so much.
You notice people around you, not growing anymore.
And this is me deciding, I won't do that.
I refuse to be safe, or choose safe.
I refuse to die this young.
This period of time is for choosing brave and showing some frikkin' courage.
I want to keep the trust of a child, for a long long time.
And the courage to go head first.
And to keep looking, for the thing that makes me happiest, in this world.
And believe that true love exists.
And fall in love with everything, all the time, every day, with no questions asked and no boundaries.
And eat ice-cream.
And run around.
Because when did having fun stop being a normality.

I won't die at 25.
I won't die at 35, or 45, or anything-5.

I will carry on developing, and seeing, and seeking.
And marveling.
And wondering and wandering.
And seeing magic everywhere.
Because otherwise there is no point.

With all the love I hold.
M.

macklemore

Love is patient, love is kind

I don't usually enjoy rappers making songs about social injustice because it just doesn't feel sincere, at all (a personal reaction). So I don't rave about it usually.
However, Macklemore has done well, like super well.
This song is just so simple, and I believe him, and actually I believe all of his songs.
Everything from the video to the vocals and the loop, is just so goo.
And yes, Thrift Shop is beyond ingenious, but he has got so many good tracks with so much soul.

So dive into Macklemore.

I love Macklemore.

The kid's got a point.
M.

lana

Oh, stop it, you.

I've got a burning desire for you, baby.
M.

oh, my darlings

don't fret.
beauty is everywhere.
there are people all over the world who would love to know you, the real you, not the glossed over edited you.
people to lift you, inspire you.
people to raise your pulse, and make you catch your breath.
people to make you see how beautiful everything is, in its peace or in its pain.
people to wonder what your dreams are, as opposed to tell you to let them go.

imagine a lifetime lived like this.
what a wondrous thing it would be.


little miracles - don't chase them away.
don't let other peoples' words break them, or fracture them.
and keep your eyes open for magic.
for the old friend you haven't seen in a while, or someone who passes you who's smiling for no reason, or someone who looks like they are so unreasonably happy that it's almost contagious, or first snow, or last snow, or first flowers, or last flowers.
we walk on ground that lives and breathes, and there's so much awesomeness just around us.

just because someone else has lost the ability to see it, does definitely not mean you have to

with love.
Your.
M.