life

It's 0:26 right now, I'm in bed watching Twin Peaks, feeling like crap.

My voice is gone.

Why.

God this annoys me.

Something is clearly lurking somewhere and I can't find it.

Something is clearly troubling me, and it's showing in my voice.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Concerts coming soon. 

Where is excitement.

Upwards and onwards.

I do love you all.

With love.

M.

forza vitale

Hey, guys!

For starters, can I just say. Thank you for reading.
Thank you for allowing me to share this with you.
My ins and outs, and seeing where this leads.
Tutto è amore.


(PS. I think it's time soon to complete some more blog-post-drafts.)

So.
I took my own advice and started filling this new found space (discussed in the previous post) with forza vitale.

Number 1 was Bellini.
Bellini is this brilliant Italian opera composer, was alive and kicking early 19th century.
And he has written this opera about this sleepwalking girl.
And I was rinsing my brain with this BRILLIANT aria from this opera on Friday.
And it helped eeeeverything.

Number 2.
Then, I got my hair done.
It's now the rust colour I was after.

Number 3.
And then Pisces picked me up last night and took me to see this woman who makes jewellery of semi-precious stones and crystals.
I had a concrete plan of just going.
Trusting my intuition and seeing which stone I find.
Just hearing what calls to me.

And so - there were loads of bracelets and necklaces and so forth.
Nothing.
No connections to anything.
Then I saw this wall with pendants.
So this was Call no1.
And as I started browsing I saw my stone - Call no2 - quite seriously.

I don't think I've ever had a moment like that, I just felt this energy.
I know I talk a whole bunch about all this, the energies and universe and so forth, but I had never even thought this possible with y'know..a rock.
But seriously, I was blushing my head off, so so much energy, and heat.
It just matched.

And so, I bought it, it's mine, it belongs with me.
The crystal is called Aqua Aura and apparently it is super intense.
The lovely woman-babe who makes these beauuutiful pendants and bracelets did say that I should only take this with me if I am "ready".
Ready to accept and embrace everything that will come my way, learn further, develop further, see more, hear more, trust more, love more openly and freely, restrict myself less, no boundaries, just following my soul, my freedom, my Heart and my own truth.

So I said yes, I'm ready.
Let's do this.

You know, I JUSTTT wrote about this in the previous post.
The space that Acceptance left.
And this crystal (photo below) just brings this all together.
Nature does not deal in empty space, I always say this.
Empty space gets filled with something.
And if we get to it quick enough, we can fill the gaps in our lives ourselves.
When the departure of something creates vacuum, just give it something, one push, apply the substance and it will be sucked in.
The vacuum pulls it in.

If we ignore this, the vacuum will suck in something anyway, but most probably unnecessary, or toxic, or and old pattern.
Help yourself.
I am helping myself with Italian, and more opera, and new hair, and new thoughts, and ....there's plenty space for something else.
Actually the woman yesterday suggested drawing.
Funny that, it's something I always forget even though I adore it.
Dancing.
Yoga?
A big big clean.
Out with the old energy, to further create more space, more vacuum.

And never to forget that everything, every single thing, every single pain and hurt and loss and emotion is a Teacher.
We learn something from every turn, we learn something from every experience.
The soul never loses, it only gains.

Tutto è amore.
Love, always.

Yours truly.
M.

LIFE MOMENT

So.

The other day in rehearsal.

I had a proper life moment.

I love having moments of clear realization or understanding about things.

And my thing at hand was my voice.

Point is.

We've had two concerts now, and it's UH-MAZING.

Seriously.

It's going so well.

I can't even.

Crazy.

So now I'm back in my room, I'm staying in the theatres quarters, watching National Treasure 2. 

I have some lemonade and a KitKat.

This concert is so cool.

It's just an incredible program and I love the people and just yep.

I am one happy cat.

Seriously.

Happy birthday, to everyone.

And good night.

I love you all.

Yours truly.

M.

how-to

My simple how-to for cheering myself up?

AC/DC and green tea, with jasmine.

Seriously, the riff of Back in Black is just unbeatable.
Just as a thing, and then thinking of it in Iron Man.
I mean, this just cannot be beat.

It's like the instant-coffee of cheering myself up.

Also.
I never talk inspirational women.
Helen Mirren, though, guys.
You know.

Helen Mirren.

Peace out, and I hope you're having an excellent Thursday.
Happy whatever.
Happy anything/everything to you.

With love and light.
Yours truly.
M.

grace and choice

This lyric from this song absolutely kills me.
I love it, beyond beyond.



And usually these lists of nice -insert something- don't work for me, but this is truly wonderful.
And I am inclined to agree with all of it.

don't i know it

His voice.

End up where you really belong.
M.

shift

So.
Nordic music is shifting the plains of my heart and soul right now.

Björk's "Bachelorette" is actually the first music video I remember seeing.
Then I forgot about it for at least a decade, and then it made a comeback.
I still can't put my finger on what was it about this video that literally burnt into my brain like acid. The colours and the cinematography, but something else.
Maybe one day I'll figure it out.
And Björk as a symbol, and Björk as a creative force. Or just a force of nature.

Sigur Ros just makes me really happy, and really sad (or maybe it's nostalgia?). And it makes me feel like snow. One of my friends once wrote somewhere that their favourite thing, or favourite music (can't remember) was listening to Sigur Ros on untouched snow. Actually it might have been some other band entirely. But that's beside the point.
It makes me miss winter. Which is fairly rare, for the simple fact that if there's something I like less than autumn then it's a long, dreary winter. But Sigur Ros for some reason makes me miss all thing wintery.

Their music reminds me of a night when I was 15, going on 16 and it was I think the 20th of January, if I'm not mistaken, or something along those lines. That night I had attended my first rave ever, it was in a big warehouse and the blinded-by-the-first-love-of-my-lifetime-first-boyfriend was organising it with his friends. I was dropped home around 6am. And I walked home, with my mahoosive black winter coat that I still have and it makes me look like a bear-hunter. I was wearing some flamed DCs (?) and neon yellow gloves. And I had crimped hair.
And so I walked home, across freshly-fallen icy, shiny snow. It was the clearest night I can remember in my life. The sky was so dark blue, like I was under a huge duvet. And the stars were all there. And my street looked like a Hollywood-set on a Sunday, so desolate, and peaceful. Like it was catching its breath.
I used to live on the most beautiful street on earth. It was the smallest little street, so tiny that even taxi-drivers found it hard to locate. No one ever noticed it. A pedestrian and a car didn't fit at the same time. And that street looked good all through the year. I could probably cry human tears thinking of walking home from the bus stop, spring, summer, autumn or winter. It was just so sheltered and so beautiful in its small-small scale.
And so I walked home that night, almost 8 years ago. It must have been around -25C, but I took my sweet time, because it was the most perfect walk home. And I was so - happy. There is no other word more fit to explain what I was feeling. Just steady peace and quiet happiness, at the fact that I was warm, I was calm, and I knew I was loved. And the snow. The streetlights were still working. And the air was just frozen in this serenity that only winter holds.

Sigur Ros remind me of this night. God knows why.
Sigur Ros remind me of home, and snow, and lots of space, and plains, just wide wide wide.

The sound of Lykke Li's voice does something very dramatic to my insides. It's hard to put a finger on or explain it, so I won't attempt either. But it does something. Literally shifts something.
It moves me. Some things that do not usually move are moved, physically.
Wounded Rhymes album is just another thing.
That's all.

Homeboys.
EWERT AND THE TWO DRAGONS.
If you're not familiar with them (of course with the chance that you don't like this sort of music at all, but maybe you do), I really do recommend.
The levels of musicianship are just crazy. CRAY-Z.
I like EVERYTHING about this song. And I mean, EVERYTHING. Even the fact that the lead singer looks so much like one of my friends, which just makes the whole experience so much better.

Iceland, Sweden, Iceland, EESTI.
M.