untitled

All life is, is a continuing journey towards our true (or truest) self.

understand

So this is what I've been thinking.

All I need, is for my person to understand me philosophically.
All the rest can be overcome and whatever, doesn't really matter.

What I mean by this is - if I have to justify myself or over-explain myself, that is a no go.
If I have to justify why I believe that things WILL be better, and life CAN just go the way I want it to go, if I commit and make a plan and work for it, if someone makes me justify all this - the answer is NO.
If someone wants to question my enthusiasm for the future that I want -  S C R E W    Y O U.


Do not question my faith in a future of my own choosing!

Do not. question. my faith. in a future of my own choosing.
Just. Do. Not.

Therefore - NO.


I'll take my future, I'll take my belief, and faith, and hope, and screw you.
I am a realist.
Just in my world, this does not mean being an asshole pessimist.
It means helping and nourishing my own enthusiasm and the enthusiasm of others.
That TOO is realistic.
So f_ck you.

And THAT, my dears, is what I've been thinking.


With love.
Yours truly.
M.

visuals

Hey, guys!

Happy spring!

I hope it's spring where you are.

Anyway. Life's been a general mumble-jumble for the last few days, so here's a visual catchup for you, instead of a written one.

Short version:

Had a gig on Thursday, then changed the backgrounds on my phone, always a big thing, and now I'm off to the National to practice (a friend of mine works there and she hooked me up with a PRACTICE ROOM). 

Message of the day: Give up.

Really - Give. Up.

We don't know anything, and we cannot control anything.

The sooner you give up, the sooner you can start enjoying life and just seeing where life takes you. 

Have faith in the good to come, but Just. Give. Up.

Stop fighting the current, give up and see where the forces carry you. 

Adventure, right?

Love, forever and always.

Yours truly.

M.

direction(s)

First of all.
Can I just say.
I know most of this makes me sound like an actual psycho, all this emotional instability et cetera.
BUT. It's not like I'm moaning or whatever because I think it's super nice.
This is just a by-product of what happens when a person undergoes some serious changes.
And these changes are positive!
But GOD it's hard sometimes.
Hard and BORING.
But whatever.
I much prefer being what I'm like right now, than what I was like before.
So I'll take the sh*t parts with a big pinch of salt, and on we go.
**

Well, well.
All this just keeps going up and down and up and down and up and down and up and down.


Same with today.
Everything is up and down.


Mid-April.

God, what/such confusion.


I really want something to hold on to in this current madness.
And so I shall hold on to the idea that this will pass, and the seas will most definitely calm down.



Peace and love.
Yours truly, always.
M.



Two photos below.
One from yesterday, one from this TV show from 2010.

hey, guys!!

I'm feeling so cheerful it's almost weird.

We're sat on the bus on our way back to Tallinn.

I'm listening to Beethoven's 9th (thanks, shuffle!), drinking birch tree juice and googling vegan recipes and Eco-shops in Tallinn. Post-fasting you basically have to recover for as long as you did the fast so in my case 5 days. 

This doesn't mean anything else apart from being super gentle to my insides.

Also, I really want a juicer.

Time to check the budget.

Peace and love and happy Sunday!

M.

wind over heaven

This tattoo was first noted on October 23, 2011, when Johnny played at the Continential Club in Austin, Texas while promoting The Rum Diary.
It is believed to be Wind over Heaven from the I Ching, an ancient Chinese text called Book of Changes.
Its meaning is -

"Forcing your way will only bring misfortune.
Remain focused on your path and remove obstacles with gentle actions.
Look at the long term.
Plant the correct seeds now to reap a harvest in the future.
Cultivate patience, tolerance, adaptability and detachment.
Accept that all you can do is change yourself."

Wind over heaven.

Yours truly.
Love and light.
M.

cinematography

Buzkashi boys.

Link to the trailer.
http://vimeo.com/34778382

I just love films.
Films about something else.

Buzkashi.
M.

jenna

"This is just, something." (As described by A. But I really really agree.)

Jenna Marbles is known for her pretty brilliant Youtube channel, where she posts a video every Wednesday, about anything really, anything that she fancies.
She's always absolutely hilarious, and looks so positively full of life.
And this week her video was something very different.

Even if you don't follow her channel on Youtube, and you have 8 minutes, watch this.
I think it's worth a watch.
And a nice idea in itself.

Draw your life.
M.

choose

I think we have a choice.
Or at least I have decided I want to have a choice.

Either to live my life according to the ingrained calling of the Nordic logic, of pre-plan everything or imminent death and starvation through lack of crops and cold will arrive.
Or the way of the warmer, damper parts. You can plan, but you can also wait. Because there's fruit and there's heat. So you won't die.

"Life is a privilege, not a right."
(The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.)

And we are in charge of shaping how we see this privilege, how we shift and form it. Whether we have time or not, to stop and maybe look, and enjoy, and be.
Because if the only thing you're concerned with is the next step and the step after that and the one after that, you'll end up missing the entire journey.

And where is the sense in that.

I choose south.
Take time, my darlings. Because that tricky f*cker can sometimes steal away, and really quietly.

Infinite possibilities. 
M. 

ldn

Last few snaps of LDN.

My old housemate's cat, Jarvis. Who's like my soulmate and the most chilled out cat, ever.
Some light on my street view.
The den that I built with help from AJ like a week ago. This goes with my strong strong belief that we must play more. This is not something that children do exclusively, everyone should do more of this.

And the last one, up in the air, LDN to TLN, 13-02-2013

Snaps.
M.

annoying

Okay.
I'm gonna stop being a stroppy asshole of a leftover-teenage now. And get the fuck over it.
Or at least explain it.

So, the reason I'm so annoyed.

A lot of things are shifting right now and it's really confusing the f_ck out of me.
I'm the kind of person who likes keeping a finger on the pulse of things, in my life. Because I don't have a manager or a management to sort my things, I'm so involved with figuring out "where" things are going, what projects to undertake, how to do and what to do and who to do it with.
Which is all fine.
Point is.
A lot is changing, a lot is happening, a lot needs to be decided.

WHICH IS FINE.

But you know, when it's just so much at the same time.
And I'd like someone to tell me anything, just anything at all. Any advice as to how to do stuff.

So far this hasn't explained why I'm so angry at all..
I don't like being angry and not knowing why.
I'm angry cause I'm frustrated, I'm frustrated cause I can't know what stuff is going to be like in a month or so.
Tomorrow I'm gonna make a plan. Sing a concert.
And then after my final gig is done tomorrow, I'm going to remind myself of all the things that are awesome.
And get. some. clarity.

And it will all be fine.
M.