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Happy Tuesday night, everyone!

Pisces has joined me in town today so this is our first official night in the pad.

I've been here a little over a week.

So far we've had a celebratory cider, planted some herbs and listened to the crazy loud birdsong.

I think it's a mix of having a park right behind the house and also being on the 5th floor - the birds stay at the very tops of the trees and therefore the clarity of their sound from here is crazy.

It's the most divine soundtrack. 

I unpacked my books today and spoke to dad about the need to celebrate.

Anything. Everything.

Life.

He agreed and said he'd come for a flat-warming party as soon as possible.

I loved his enthusiasm!

So now I'm in bed, ready for sleep.

We will see what tomorrow brings exactly but today I will sleep easier.

Peace and love, darlings.

Yours truly.

As always.

M.

dialogue

I must have more dialogue with myself.
I cannot go on auto-pilot, this does not work and is eventually truly truly destructive, and therefore also very counter-productive.
I need to stay present and need to stay mindful.


Lessons in life.


Also.
Gratitude second.
I cannot believe that Life has been kind enough to send my teacher my way.
It's so bizarre how the destruction and creation came from the same source.
Mystical, I tell you.
Mystical.


Happy Friday, everyone.
I'm home for a sec and then off to Keiu's for a dinner party.
Which is just about the loveliest of all plans.


I cannot cross the line where my need for personal space becomes involuntary detachment.
Learn, child.
And be happy in this Universe.
Everything else is blindness and a waste.

Learning myself and learning my boundaries.
What an interesting ride.



Love, to all of you.
Yours truly, always.
M.

Rachel

I mean, I don't really remember how many times I've posted about Rachel Brathen, but quite seriously, I find her so positive, and positively inspiring!

So therefore.
Just some shameless link-giving.
http://www.rachelbrathen.com/
http://instagram.com/yoga_girl
http://www.facebook.com/rachelsyoga?hc_location=stream

I just find her super awesome.
Simple as.
And promoting really healthy ideas, and images of women, men, people, dogs and whatever.
And courage.
Courage to more from Sweden to Aruba (??), in your early twenties, and do things your way.

Seriously.

This also goes hand-in-hand with my constant reminder at the back of my head: "Hey, Maria, do yoga. Why are you not doing yoga."
I love it, yet I'm not doing it.
Shall be fixed.

Thursday for Rachel.

Yours truly.
M.

bridges

This is going to be a post about bridges.

Sometimes in our lives we get to a point where our projects stall, our exciting new beginnings just fizzle into nothing, and slowly but surely we start fizzling into nothing ourselves.
This does not mean that we stop living all-together, or quit jobs or stop brushing our hair or washing our faces, you know.
This means something different.
It just means that we stop living as ourselves. As the You-est You.

That connection fizzles out.
It's like we can see our bridges burn, and we just let them.
We let this happen.

This includes wrong relationships, the ones where we can see ourselves shine dimmer and dimmer.
Or the wrong jobs.
Or the wrong places where we shouldn't live.
And so on, and so on, and so on.
This list goes on.

But the bottomline is, we let this happen.

The "how" doesn't interest me that much.
These vary for everyone.

But if I could know one thing, I'd know the "why".
Why would we stand in our own way?




We have every single opportunity to live out this life in the most glorious of ways.
And yet we choose to just stand there, and watch our bridges burn.
The bridges between you and YOU.

Which at the very end of the day are singlehandedly the most important ones.

Live the right life, for you.
Wake up following the schedule that is right, for you.
Work the job that's right, for you.

And for the sake of Jesus, TAKE YOUR TIME to find out.
Because truth is, we live and then we die.
It's pretty simple.

Why waste this sublime time.
On people who makes us less.
On clothes that are boring.
On places that stifle.

Why?

(I am asking myself to answer this.)

Why let the most important bridge burn.
Truth is, the sooner we notice this, honestly, look at this in the eye, and catch it mid-flame, we can put it out, find some new stone and wood and rebuild it.
But stand there and watch it go up in flames.
No.

Just, no.

Life is too short for that.

Bridges.M.

 

experience, my darling

Okay, I feel like I should write a semi-conclusive post about the experiences I've had of late.
There's so much stuff that I think I'm already starting to forget.
And I don't write this up anywhere.

So, where do we start.


Prince Rama and the birthday of the Cinema "Friendship", yesterday.
And the girls being super.
Imagine Dragons - Radioactive. Thankyou, A.
Make my systems blow.
New friends and people, S. and K. and E. a little.
And going out with K, and V.
RHIZOME.
Mutantants.
Tallinn Music Week in Von Krahl.
And Inga Copeland in Von Krahl - the music music music

Spanish one's truth time hitting the nail
on the head

Dance more
Dance
so much dancing lately

Easter service singing

Skype conference talking.
More safety in my own decisions

Della Reese and my ringtone "Come on a my house".
Best decision ever
ever

And one of the songs K sent me just making me get up, around 1am, and spending 6 minutes upside down. Mostly in downward dog, leg up, and trying to get back to my friend, supported headstand.
Why
no one knows
And Hallelujah emerging.
Last time I listened to that, 2nd of September 2006.
And it came back last night
Like I told myself not to listen to it unless I'm home.

Dying my hair dark
Lifting heavy stuff
Warrior time

Rhizome Rave
And new people, new people

And K and M-L.
Just, YES.
YES
And dancing with A.
The dancing

And whiskey shots and freedom

And my Guru cousin's lectures and seminars.
New insight
And logical insight
Techniques and things to do, how to get rid of the unwanted.
And everything to do with his place, Lilleoru.
Flowervalley

Looking for things to fan my flames.

The greedy kid being not greedy.
Change yourself and the world around you will change.



In conclusion.
The not-so-subtle message:

WELCOME
TO
THE
NEW
AGE

I Give Thanks.
M.


Ps, I bet I'll read this back in some time, and not understand one. single. thing.
Whatever.

And below, my trusty, trusty, trusty, trusty Hamsa.

bare bones

I don't like Rihanna's image and I don't like the vast majority of her music.
This, however, is not in that category, at all.
On the contrary.

I threw my hands in the air I said show me something

Something in the way you move.
M.

the one to set you free

The amount of love I have for this tune is crazy.
M.

I could be the one to make you feel that wayI could be the one to set you free

oh and by the way

...We did the pizza+OFFICIAL+yay+day thing today. 

And it was divine.
M+E.



COOOOOKE. Cans of Coke in the fridge make. a. home.

9 good reasons

Saturday morning made me laugh.
I got a trolley bus home from town, at 08.03am, clear as a sunshiny day.
And it made me laugh, so very much. That whole situation.
And I think I giggled the whole way.
I was wearing a hat, and I wasn't cold.

The whole night was meant to end at 2am, when the right person asked me why I'm going the wrong way.
And then the smoky chats about the state of the arts, specific advice how to further my career, suburban slang, who would eat cats or dogs, how to raise your pigs, benefits of working in a gold mine in Australia, what makes an Estonian, lovely kind people, double-straws, wet feet dancing, shouting "SAY MY NAAAME!" whilst dancing with said wet feet, then the bean bag jumping, and the squealing, and the Cosmos, and the leftover Cosmo shots, and the morning, and the "Ich liebe" to Tallinn, and the 7.30am empty bottles to the bins.
This week just gone was incredible.

(Friday. what is that sparkle?
Ps, I promise I don't actually have a facial expression as unpleasant as that. My Dell snapshot central does that to me. And it's slightly hideous.
So for now, for the lack of a better face/expression, my apologies.)

 

And now I made pasta for dinner. I don't make good pasta and this was good.

And I replaced my old phone that just refused to work anymore.
And out of love, the old one is being repaired.
And the new one is nice.
As was the pasta.
So much nice, it's coming out of my ears.

I want to be a man, and I want to be the Count of Monte Cristo.
M.